huge house party, flyin through the air, spy business

Nov 26, 2014 11:54am crazy dream: we went to a huge house party. there were two lines of people. one for the upstairs party and one for the downstairs party. the house was dark colored brick on the outside and pinkish-orange on the inside, owned by a friend of a friend. after waiting a long time in line, we finally made it upstairs. within a short time, i somehow pissed off the homeowner, so we were asked to leave. she followed us to a large plastic tote where i grabbed my stuff. then she said she needed to give me a tupperware lid before i left to make sure she entered the sweepstakes(?) we ended up in a hotel room that was also painted pink. we were watching tv, lying on the bed when we heard a loud explosion outside. except the explosion threw us from the bed and myself through the air in a high arc. in sublime slow motion i came crashing down and woke up for a brief moment. later we were spies, living in some small town and conducting our spy business at the local library. another spy would show up and sit on the opposite side at a library desk with those little dewey decimal drawers. we would both pull out the drawer and i would slide the spy info and bomb making materials through to the other side, until the librarian showed up and almost caught us. finally i suggested we leave our hotel rooms, because they were so easily bugged. we went to a local teenage hangout and drank a beer and stayed paranoid. eventually i woke up.

hollow man?

so i had this dream earlier in the week. i don't know where we are, or what we're doing, but somehow i cut the bottom of my palm open. instead of red flesh under the skin, there is empty space. i realize that part of my arm and hand are completely hollow. and that because of this, i will probably die soonish. i tell everyone at the party (?) that i'm somehow hollow inside, but they make jokes about it and act like it's no big deal.

that's all i remember

finding your shapshifting parrot on a craft beer train

dream:

we left the house in a small black car. we were talking the entire way to the train station. drove past landmarks that i don't recognize. hills, creeks, houses, and trees. she dropped me off at the train and i waited in line and got on. the train was a 'beer locomotive' or something. it went through small towns and stopped occasionally while everyone drank craft beer.

so i'm guzzling hop-filled pale ales on a slow moving train. the train is old, but lovingly refurbished. woodgrain this and wrought iron that. i step out on a small landing between cars, and there is mango, our sun conure. she is hanging on some metal bars, looking exhausted. i flip out and search for something to put her in, to keep her safe. i run into the train again. i can't seem to find anything. when i come back out to the landing, my cousin bobby is standing there. mango is gone. before i can flip out any more, bobby tells me that he is actually mango. she is a shape-shifter. i ask mangobby how long she has been following me, she says she flew 50 or so miles behind the car. "how did you get out the door?" "i flew quickly through before it closed." this almost makes me sick, that we didn't notice the bird flying out behind us. she could have been injured.

so i ask mangobby to stay in human form so i don't have to worry about her flying off, and we can talk. she agrees and has a beer. i decide to call barbie and ask her if mango is ok back in her cage at the house. "hello?" "hey, it's me. i just wanted to see how mango was doing?" "how mango is doing? fine, why?" "are you sure?" "*sigh* yes, i'm sure. let me double check" at this point i have become an annoyance. i smile at mangobby and am about to drop the news: the bird is safe in human form, drinking beer on a train with me. except she never comes back to the phone. i can hear her talking to dad in the background. like they're talking about car hubcaps or engine filters. medium volume. this goes on for about 15 minutes before i hang up.

i eventually get distracted when the train stops. more people are getting on. i set my phone down somewhere and now i can't find it. i run from car to car, looking for the phone thief, with mangobby in tow. some conductor-hat wearing kid takes me to a lost and found. he grabs a phone from a wooden box and hands it to me. "this is a samsung galaxy whatever, my phone is an iphone!"

eventually i wake up and check to see if my phone is there.

eyehategod interview, moving to charleston

two separate dreams this morning:

i met with the guys from EYEHATEGOD for a book i was writing. it was supposed to be an official biography, i think. we were hanging out at various locations while i asked questions and wrote down notes and recorded them via audio. they gave more and more info. finally i started asking the tough questions and they didn't wanna talk so much anymore. then i woke up.

finally i got back to sleep. eventually i was told we were packing up and moving to a hotel in charleston, il. with a woman and her 3 kids. all the anipals were left behind or someone took them, i'm not sure. i kept protesting the move but was told over and over it was for the best. the hotel room had two queen sized beds and a small bathroom. there was a large backyard that all the hotel residents shared. at the bottom of some stairs, back in the far corner, were stacks of tiny rabbit cages. they were just laying on top of one another like someone put them down and ran off. our bunny wasn't even there. on one end of the hotel, there was a bar and pool area. i went down to the pool and tried to figure out how the hell i was going to get out of the situation.

the end?

Starting a band with steven tyler in the post-apocalyptic futurescape

Aug 22, 2014 10:57am i had a dream this morning where, in a post-apocalyptic dystopia, aerosmith's steven tyler and i decided to start a band together while riding our horses through the wastelands. we rescued kate hudson and she joined the band.

drunken snuggie vs the cops, tourin' via porches, wendys ban

dreams from this morning:

i was in a yard next to a white picket fence type house. it was night. i'm talking to, or trying to convince a cop not to arrest my wife. she has had a few drinks and she's really mad and yelling at them. there is at least 5 or 6 and they want to take her to jail. she's wearing a snuggie. she goes  back in the house and sits on a recliner. we go into the kitchen. i keep talking to the cop, telling him she doesn't need jail, she needs a nap. then i hear them getting angry and i run around the other side from the kitchen into the living room. i'm only wearing boxers and a tshirt. all the cops have sawed-off shotguns and they all freak out and point them at me. i put my hands up and start yelling, "really? gonna shoot me in my underwear?" and they get embarrassed and lower the guns.

later, the band is on tour or something. we're playing a show on the porch of  a tall house somewhere in the south. the porch overlooks a large field. kids are running around and we can't find any power cables or cables for the PA. this goes on forever and the show never seems to start.

then another dream where wendys was banned from serving food forever by the government. people are debating if it was right or wrong. i just thought it was funny

worst dream ever?

so i had this awful dream the other day. it was me but not me. i was working in a dirty warehouse factory type of place, with toxic metal chemicals. i was new to the job and all the other workers hated me. we had to wear gray jumpsuits. everyone was covered in soot and dirt from the metal. my hands were still dirty no matter how many times i washed them, the metal had gotten into the cracks of my skin.
after a few weeks of working there, getting picked on and pushed around, i got very tired of it. there were several incidents that i can't clearly remember but all of them involved me hating being there and wanting a way out, and someone causing me pain. finally something happened and it put me over the edge. the guy who was always taunting me and causing me problems shoved me into some of the metal but i caught myself before falling into it and shoved him to the floor. there was a split second where i had a decision to make: beat the living shit out of this person and stand up for myself, or let it go. time sort of stopped. then i decided to get my revenge. i told myself that it wasn't real, after all. that nothing was real. then i viciously beat this persons face into a pulp and enjoyed it. releasing a mass amount of emotional distress in the process. once i stopped, everyone stood and looked at me, frightened. then the scene started to fade, and a voice started talking. it was an older version of me. "that was 60 years ago. that's why i'm here." and the view cut back to this other me as a very old man, who was in prison for this beating. who had served 60 years and only had a year or two left to serve. now i was feeling a tangled mass of anxiety, trying to figure out how i would restart my life after being behind bars for so long. i kept telling myself that it wasn't real but i slowly couldn't hear that voice anymore because the reality seemed to be setting in. finally i woke up and was pretty disturbed by the whole thing.

the end?

Coffinworm live 5.4.14

here's some footage i shot and edited of my favorite metal band in town.

big show for which band?

dream:

i was at some big venue that was totally packed. seemed like it might have been pepsi coliseum or something similar. i'm here to see the big show. eventually lazyhawk finds me wandering the halls. "are you ready to play? you start in five minutes!" this sets in a panic, as i don't know which band he's talking about. then i realize neither band has practiced for the show so it doesn't matter, it's going to sound sloppy. this goes on a for a long while, but i never get to the part where we start playing.

the end?

tiny brown piglet w/ wolf

dream:

we're in the backyard of a new house. it is surrounded by chain link fencing. we're playing with the cats. suddenly i see a tiny brown piglet, about the size of a potato. i point to it. despite standing very close to it she can't see it. i point again at the piglet as it starts to move. it's super cute. she still can't see it because of a small tree in the yard. eventually i realize there is a wolf attached to the piglet by a small string that runs into the wolf's mouth. i start to panic trying to figure out how to save the piglet. i can't remember beyond that point.

the end?

on vacation, rental home renovations, underwear riding

dream:

my wife and i were on vacation somewhere, probably vegas. we rented some house instead of staying at a hotel. for some reason she gets mad at me and decided she would renovate the house. she ripped up some floor tiles and part of a wall. there would also be painting involved. i tried to argue that it wasn't our house, (and we were on vacation!) to no avail. eventually i had to leave so i grabbed a motorcycle and took off. i think it belonged to the homeowner. anyway, i am blocks away at a stop light when i realize i am wearing only tighty-whiteys. i have to get back to the house and get my pants. i make a u-turn and head into some neighborhood. i ride the motorcycle down an alley and up into someone's backyard. finally riding it into their open backdoor. there are people in the house, and i try to explain to them i just need to get home and put on some pants, "i'm on vacation," i say. turns out it is some girl i went to high school who lives there. and her husband i also know from somewhere. we start remembering the old times and head to a burger king. we're eating whoppers and talking and finally i remember i am not wearing pants. so i head outside to get the motorcycle and it's gone. someone took it. now i have to walk back and i'm not even sure where i am.

the end?

huge family dinner, sleeping = good, broken glasses

dreamz:

i'm sleeping in a cubbyhole adjacent to a big dining room. my mom is trying to wake me up because the entire family (and several other families, apparently) are over for some holiday dinner. i am in and out of a dream and getting irritated, so i curse and yell. allegedly everyone hears and is offended. finally i wake up and go into the dining area (or one of the dining areas) and knock over an entire bowl of peas and bacon. don't mess with me! finally i go up the stairs of this house (which looks like a mansion) and open a door. there are a bunch of little kids in there, all dressed up. i introduce myself and we become fast friends. waking up is yucky, they say.

later i'm walking down a street with a line of trees in the middle of it. my glasses suddenly fly off my head, i think because my head is getting too big. the glasses fly in two sections and land about 50 feet away. i run over to pick them up and they are broken in the center. i put them on even though they are broken and they fall off, over and over.

the end?

two giant arm gashes vs. foam healing worm

yesterday i had a dream i was hanging out with MSNBC's alex wagner. while sitting around with friends, i realized there was something gnawing on my right arm. i looked down to see two huge gashes on my forearm. they were an inch wide and a few inches long. on the left one was what looked to be a giant worm made of 'foam' that was part of my own cells. the worm had a head that was chewing the seams together to make it heal. we all watched in amazement. it was three times bigger than the biggest caterpillar. eventually it healed the cut all the way up and the worm disintegrated and fell off. the cut on the right became bigger though, and went all the way down to my thumb. it didn't hurt. i was showing it off like a battle wound. what?

the end?